Q: My 81-year-old grandma has been dating a man her own age for a few years now. They’re not planning on getting married, but they are a “couple.” How should I refer to him? “Boyfriend” just seems weird, and grandma just calls him Larry.

A: The Ninja agrees that “Manfriend” has an unsavory ring to it. You could go Southern Gothic and call him her “Gentleman Friend.” “Companion” is always acceptable. You could be dry and dispassionate and call him her “sexual associate,” but that might inadvertently force you to think of your octogenarian grandmother and Larry having… oh, forget the Ninja said anything.

The terms “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” have evolved from innocuous origins. Basically, they originally meant a casual friend of a particular gender. As the terms evolved and their application became more intimate, it was the gender more than the age that was the real reference point; there are 19^th century examples of the terms being used about people well into adulthood. Today, because the terms are now suffused with romantic meaning, it may make some people uncomfortable to refer to their partners with a title that has such an inescapably childish connotation.

The Ninja suggests that you make a note of how your grandmother introduces Larry to others, and how she may refer to him herself. If she continues to be relentlessly vague, just say that he is her dear friend. The Ninja is quite sure that everyone will know what you mean. Furthermore, the Ninja is positive that no one will press you for details.

Q: I’ve noticed that the word “passionate” is appearing in contexts that don’t seem to inspire passion. Why is this?

A: The term “passion,” according to the 2010 edition of the Pocket Oxford American Dictionary, means: “n. (1) Very strong emotion. (2) A strong enthusiasm for something. (3) (The Passion) Jesus’ suffering and death on the cross.”

A fairly mild and efficient definition. Let’s take a look at a slightly older variation, shall we?

Webster’s New American Dictionary (Unabridged, Second Edition) states: “n. (1) originally, suffering or agony, as of a martyr. (2) The agony and suffering of Jesus during the Crucifixion or during the period following the Last Supper. (3) The state of being affected by an external agent or influence; the condition of being acted upon as opposed to action. (4) Any one or combination of the emotions, as hate, grief, love, fear, joy, etc. (5) Extreme, compelling emotion; intense emotional drive or excitement; specifically: a. great anger; rage; fury; b. enthusiasm or fondness; c. strong love or affection; d. sexual drive; lust.”

Now, it seems that the fiery nature of the term “passion” has been extinguished somewhat over time, hasn’t it? Even the representation of Jesus on the cross lost some of its intensity. Let’s explore why that might have been.

Although humans are capable of feeling passionate about a diverse array of subjects, the Ninja simply can’t envision a world where people are legitimately “passionate” about creating digital marketing solutions for effective revenue generation. Is the whole office writhing and sweating with unconstrained lust? Wouldn’t that be great?

The Ninja suspects that the word “passionate” has been hijacked by the same interests responsible for the seizure of the verb “curate.” It makes the companies that employ that kind of terminology seem extremely dedicated. They have passion for what they do! Their joy is absolutely unbridled! They’re far too enraptured by their jobs to merely gather data – they curate it!

In the end, “passionate” has taken on a marginally altered meaning through repeated usage within specific contexts. It doesn’t thrill the Ninja that a word with such a historically fecund definition has become unquestionably diluted, but it has, because… that’s language for you.

Passion can mean a strong enthusiasm, and it can also mean an extreme, possibly uncontrollable, emotional motivation. It isn’t wrong when a travel agent says that she is “passionate about finding you the best summer vacation packages,” because passion has been given a broader spectrum of sensation. So, when you walk into a “passionate” travel agency, expect to be greeted by a team that is happy to serve you; don’t worry about being swept into an orgy.

Holly Troupe is a professional web content writer and an amateur everything else. She spends her days writing, eating, and looking for ways to incorporate the term “perfidy” into the urban vernacular.