Q: What is the difference between “less than” and “fewer than?”

A: This distinction is one of those linguistic phenomena that is more a matter of style than actual, understandable meaning. No matter which form you use, you will be understood perfectly, but that won’t stop people from calling you a moron on social media forums if you don’t use the “correct” phrase. Well, the Ninja is all for jettisoning useless style rules, but she prefers doing so only after those style rules are learned and understood. It’s the difference between presenting yourself either as an intellectual maverick, or just sounding like a failed reality TV star.

You might have heard grammar pedants snidely denounce the “15 items or less” sign at the supermarket.

“Hurumph!” they’ll say, adjusting their monocles. “Don’t they realize that the correct phrase is ’15 items or fewer?” They’ll typically make this point as they’re pulling out their checkbooks to pay for the 25 cases of Ensure that they insist are only one item.

The basic rule governing the use of “less than” or “fewer than” is: plural items use “fewer,” singular items (items that cannot be counted individually, yet can be reduced in mass or volume) use “less.”

“Fewer than” example: “This box was full before I turned my back, but now there are fewer than six Krispy Kremes left! WTF?”

“Less than” example: “That’s nothing – there’s less than half of that bacon ranch kale quinoa guacamole in the bowl. That really makes no sense.”

So, if the difference is a matter of the plurality of the items being described, then you’d say: “I had fewer than 50 dollars in the bank,” right? Of course not. That’s because units of measurement are typically singular and not plural, since they are taken as a singular group. The units of measurement are:

• Distance (meters, miles, feet, inches, etc.)
• Time
• Weight
• Monetary

We don’t say “Fifty dollars are a lot of money,” do we? Nope, but that’s mainly because $50 will barely pay for a cheeseburger in some downtown restaurants. It is also because of our philosophical understanding of measurements.

We typically think of measured items as a whole, and not a conglomeration of parts. We’d say: “Six ft. is pretty tall,” not “Six ft. are pretty tall,” because it is the totality of the measurement that makes the statement logical.

“Jenna is fewer than 5 ft. tall.” Wrong!

“Jenna is less than 5 ft. tall.” Correct!

“Jenna is pretty darned short.” Obviously!

Naturally, exceptions can be made. Let’s say that you are in a club, “makin’ it rain,” so to speak. Since you’re not abundantly wealthy, the floor is littered with single dollar bills. A dancer notices, and says, “Meh… there are probably fewer than 30 dollar bills down there.” Technically, she’s right, since in this case, she’s referring to the particular number of objects, as evidenced by the addition of the word “bills.” She’s clearly one of those dancers who is legitimately working her way through grad school.

The Ninja understands that it is difficult to keep all of these nuanced differences straight. This is why she suggests reconfiguring all sentences so that neither “less than” nor “fewer than” is necessary. She suggests:

• Under
• Below
• Lower than
• Smaller than
• Littler than
• Smurfier than or Lilliputer than (if you’re oppressively intellectual)
• En-smallened by (oh, why not?)

Regardless of whether you recklessly use “less” or “fewer,” just know that the aforementioned guidelines are only grudgingly agreed-upon, so do whatever makes you happy. The Ninja herself is going with “En-smallened to the tune of XYZ,” mainly because it sounds like an Electronic Prog-Rock band.

Holly Troupe is a professional web content writer and an amateur everything else. She spends her days writing, eating, and looking for ways to incorporate the term “perfidy” into the urban vernacular.