The Language Ninja is back, answering your burning grammatical questions. Of course, if the burning persists post-answer, see your doctor.

Q: What’s the difference between “who” and “whom,” and does it matter?

A: Well, the difference matters as much as any non life-threatening issue matters. The Ebola virus certainly doesn’t give a damn.

But, for those of you who either possess a high degree of intellectual curiosity or grammar-specific OCD, the who/whom distinction could be a weighty issue.

Basically, if you can recognize which is the subject and which is the object within a sentence, then you can use “who” or “whom” correctly. The subject is the person or thing that is doing or has done something, while the object is the person or thing that has had something done to him/her/it. “Who” is suitable when used as the subject of a sentence, while “whom” is used for the object. Example:

I murdered him.

I = subject

Him = object

Murder = Felony

So, let’s say that someone uttered the phrase “I murdered him,” while a car alarm was going off. You weren’t able to understand the “I” or “him” in the sentence, but “murdered” was clear as a bell. The appropriate clarification question would be:

Who murdered whom?

See? Easy!

KEEP CALM, and identify the subject and object.

So, here’s a little quiz. Give the correct term for the proposed sentence.

1. Don brought Jim a Cronut.

To ____ did Don bring the Cronut?

1. Who
2. Whom
3. Uh… Jim?

The correct answer is: “b” – Whom. Since Jim is the recipient of the action in the sentence, he is the object, and therefore “whom” is the correct term. If you answered “a,” you can use the next few quiz questions to get a firmer grasp on the concept. If you answered “c,” you might want to set down the bong.

2. Don and Jim went to the park.

___ went to the park?

1. Who
2. Whom
3. Oooooh… Cronut.

The correct answer is: “a” – Who. Don and Jim are performing the action, so they are the subject of the sentence, and therefore “who” is the right answer. I would have also accepted “c,” provided you brought me a Cronut.

3. Have you seen Don and Jim? I was going to give them these leftover Wonuts.

___ have you seen? ___ is giving away Wonuts?

1. Whom/Who
2. Who/Whom
3. Who’s got Wonuts?

The correct answer is: “a” – Whom/Who. Now, in common parlance, we’d just say “who” in both instances, and have done with it. But we’re being persnickety, and since the people that have been seen are the direct objects of the sentence, “whom” is the correct term. Because the person giving away Wonuts is the subject of the sentence, “who” is therefore correct.

This is the most elementary explanation of the who/whom issue. There are, in fact, complexities galore – largely arising from multi-clause sentences – which frankly give the Language Ninja a headache. Unless you’re writing the stodgiest of academic papers or a piece for a storied publication, don’t lose too much sleep over who vs. whom. In the end, the arbitrary substitution of who for whom doesn’t change the meaning of any sentence the Language Ninja can think of. Honestly, the only thing the Language Ninja can think of at the moment is a Cronut.

Holly Troupe is a professional web content writer and an amateur everything else. She spends her days writing, eating, and looking for ways to incorporate the term “perfidy” into the urban vernacular.